- Published in 2014 Show Archive
November 23, 2014 - The Return of the Almighty Monkey and Just Joe's 11th Anniversary
The very day of this LE, Sunday, the 23rd of November, was Just Joe's eleventh Anniversary here. Happy Anniversary, Just Joe. Present for it were, Just Joe, which was fortunate, it would have been a shame if he hadn't been there when his Anniversary was the exact day of LE, which can only happen about every six years, EVD, Rick and Randy from "The Metallic Onslaught", Eric, Rob and R.J. from the band Thirteen South, and, someone who hasn't been here in about fifteen years, but who was there from the very beginning of LE, and was a regular co-host for a long time, The Almighty Monkey! He was going to be here earlier in the year, for our twentieth Anniversary Shows, but we learned tonight that he had fallen thirty feet out of a tree, and broken his back. Funny, you would think that monkeys should be really good at climbing trees, I mean, isn't that what they are supposed to do? There was a lot of reminiscing about his time on LE. EVD duct taped The Monkey, Randy, and Eric together, and then Azkath and Just Joe beat on them with a big metal blade, a cookie sheet, a guitar. Randy got a balloon shoved in his mouth, which he bit and popped, and Randy got a lot of disturbing, disgusting man love from Eric and The Monkey while they were all stuck together. And Azkath also put Crappy The Clown's underwear on Randy, I mean, he wasn't wearing it, but had it put on him, rubbed in his face. Randy also had to wear Dave's gross, smelly beard, which EVD had ripped off of Dave with duct tape the week before, Just Joe got to put it on him, he was given that pleasure because it was his Anniversary, after all. Randy was quite traumatized by all that happened to him this night, but he did get to break a record over The Monkey's head, which made him happy. He had to wear the beard because Russian Roulette was played, where either he or Just Joe would have to wear it, and it turned out to be Randy. But apparently, if you are in the band Thirteen South, you like wearing Dave's beard, because last week Rob had worn it on various parts of his anatomy, he did all of it himself, and now R.J. willingly put it on himself. Music was played for The Monkey, bands he likes, or that Azkath thought he would like, although I must say, I'm extremely disappointed that his theme music, the theme to the old cartoon show "The Banana Splits" as done by some nineties alternative rock people was not played, I love that song, and that was one of my favorite shows when I was little, like about ten thousand years ago. A set of songs that used to be staples on the old radio program, "The Rock Shop", was also played, also for The Monkey, as he liked that. There was a lot of reminiscing about the past eleven years that Just Joe has been with us, there has been SO MUCH that he has done, and had done to him, in that time. I made him fall off the roof once, I was actually trying to help him, trying to talk him into coming down, but instead I made him fall off of it, which got him down, just not the way I meant to. Oh well, I guess I suck at therapy. Just Joe got to pick a set of music. There were segments of Movie Time, and Just Joe discussed a web series as well. The last hour was The Old School Hour... And, once again, A VERY HAPPY ELEVENTH ANNIVERSARY TO JUST JOE!!!!!
-Fire Eater Wizard
At the beginning of the program there was a ton of people there. EVD and Dave were there seeming once again to cast doubt on the theory that they are the same person. Tim was there, and he had brought with him his friend Steve again, so it was Steve's second time there. EVD was asked if he had broken Just Joe out of rehab where he had been put to cure his I-dosing addiction. EVD said that he had gone to the rehab, but Just Joe was not there. That mystery was very soon to be solved, because just then arrived Wulfie and his brother BBBIIIIIILLLLL!!! (You have to say the name BBBIIIIILLLL!!! like that, which is why Azkath insisted he now be known as Ed), from The Metallic Onslaught. They had with them a bound and gagged Just Joe. Wulfie arrived with his werewolf mask on, but soon took it off, saying of course he was not a werewolf. Wulfie said he and BBBIIIIILLLLL!!! err, Ed were going to hold Just Joe hostage until Azkath did something about Jeffie. Azkath told Wulfie he thought he had something he would like to put an end to this problem, he would do something he would normally never do, but just for him he would, he would play Bon Jovi, as Jeffie had told him how much Wulfie liked Bon Jovi. Wulfie said Jeffie was a liar. Wulfie demanded that Azkath make Jeffie stupid, even more stupid than he already was, like really, really stupid, so that Jeffie would believe that Wulfie was really a werewolf. They had them un-gag Just Joe (and they ripped duct tape off his whole head, tearing out a lot of hair doing that), and Just Joe said that he thought he could accomplish this, he would I-dose Jeffie to be really stupid. Everyone seemed satisfied with this solution, and they charged Just Joe with that task. Just Joe started freaking out when Wulfie and Azkath started talking about Shoggoths, so Azkath played his Hugging Music to calm him down. Just Joe hugged everyone, and EVD duct taped Just Joe Dave and Shane (more on Shane in a second) together. in all the chaos that ensued there was a big man pile, and Dave did an unspeakable thing to Shane, involving Dave's butt landing on Shane in an area well let's just say that scarred Shane for life, especially when a certain gas issued forth from Dave. Shane had arrived saying that he had finally brought the proof he had been dispatched to obtain several weeks ago. He presented a large file of proof. However, although there was a lot of proof for a lot of things they had not asked him to look into, like The Loch Ness Monster, Chupacabra, Sasquatch, which was all very interesting and fascinating, but it was not what they had asked him to prove. For what they had sent him to prove, that EVD and Dave were the same person, well, on that he had brought nothing. Well, Shane is grown from Just Joe's severed hand, so, how bright could he really be. If Just Joe usually screws up anything he's tasked with how can we really expect much more from his hand. However, Azkath gave Shane another mission to try. To go get stilts, because, in a few weeks, they were going to send Just Joe out on stilts and get people's reactions. Shane said he could get stilts and ran off immediately to do so presumably. It was EVD's 5th anniversary on September 11th, which was the Saturday that ended as this LE began at midnight. Happy Anniversary, EVD! For his anniversary Azkath gave EVD lots of Styrofoam and let him beat on everyone with it. Just Joe took some of the broken Styrofoam and put it down his pants, and then started throwing it at people. There was more slapping this week. Shane was told to slap Just Joe 'til he cried. It only took about two or three to accomplish this. Well, Just Joe had had a pretty trying night, what with being held hostage, having the skin and hair being ripped off his whole head when they un-duct taped him, being traumatized with all the talk of shoggoths, and being beaten down with Styrofoam. Then Shane was told to slap EVD 'til he cried. That took a lot more, and needed several pokes in the eye to get something that could be called a tear. There was three segments of Movie Time, which EVD (who had actually seen something, and, could actually remember what it was), Tim, and Steve participated in as well.