June 27, 2010 - Sorrow of Batavia
Jason, Justin, and Bryan, who make up three fourths of the band Sorrow Of Batavia, were there for almost the first half of the program. They were interviewed, and lots of their songs were played. They rock. They had the band play each other at Boggle. The winner would get to pick a set of music. The loser would have, um well, a "fate" befall him. Jason won, so he got to pick his set of music, a heavy set. They let the band vote on which of two fates should befall Justin. Should he have a naked Just Joe and Dave give him a lap dance, or, should balloons be put on top of him, and Dave splash him 'til all the balloons were popped. All three members could vote, including Justin. Naked lap dance won out. So Just Joe and Dave stripped down and gave Justin his lap dance. But actually, Justin and Bryan got lap dances, because, though Bryan had the chance to move and avoid it, he didn't. Um, ah, guys, I'm really concerned about you! I'd advise you to seek out some professional help, like, right away, quickly! Dave, who had finally seen fit to actually show up, and then left rather early, was presented with a plaque proclaiming him the worst co-host ever, with a bad picture of him on it. Dave was thrilled to get an award, apparently not minding at all that it was saying that he was the worst, I think that was kinda lost on him. Azkath gave Dave several shots to the head with his own award, knocking him out. When Dave came to, he was told that, if he actually showed up regularly, he could have his own entrance theme music. This made Dave very happy. They gave EVD a present, because they pay attention to him when he talks, and they knew it was something he would truly love... A framed picture of George W. Bush. I'm sure those screams from EVD were screams of joy and delight. They took the picture and rubbed it all over EVD. Again, I'm sure those increasingly louder shrieks from EVD were due to the great pleasure this brought him. Just Joe put the picture in EVD's car, but EVD took it out, obviously not wanting to be away from it for even one second. But somehow he left it behind when he went home, all that joy and giddiness must have gotten to him, he just couldn't think straight. Ria, who hadn't been there in a while showed up around 3:00. There was a segment of Adventures In Listening, and Movie Time. And something Azkath had done off and on throughout the years was sort of re-debuted this night... Anomaly Corner. Throughout the last couple hours of the program, he read actual news stories of strange never explained events from over the years in various locations, a cattle mutilation, a strange yellow glow that hung over upstate New York long ago, and a never understood wave of blackness that occurred in the middle of the day, traveling through different areas, years ago. Are theory is that these could very well have been the work of Shoggoths. Just Joe whimpered every time this theory was put forth...- Fire Eater Wizard
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July 4, 2010 - Dead Host Drill
Azkath had a test for everyone there... He wanted to see how each of them would do running the program if someone had to take over because he was dead, who would be the best one for the task. He gave each one of them a hypothetical situation in which he died, they involved him going outside, because he overheats easily, and it is summer, very hot weather. In these hypotheticals, while he's outside, something kills him, he spontaneously combusts, he's run over by a herd of moose, an asteroid hits him, Gorgar is driving in his car, has a heart attack, dies, his car hits Azkath, that jolt revives Gorgar, but kills Azkath, and, a herd of deer, looking for Gorgar, shreds Azkath into a million pieces. The first one to try taking over the show was EVD. After accidentally shutting off the microphone for several seconds, he tried to play Queensryche, but Rob Zombie played instead. Despite EVD's claims that he hates Rob Zombie, we know it isn't true, it's the same thing as when he claims to hate his present last week, a framed picture of George W. Bush, it's a lie, he really loves it. EVD destroyed half the studio, he said in his attempts to get the Rob Zombie to stop playing, but we know it was really due to his wild enthusiasm for the music, he got a little, well, actually, a lot, carried away. It didn't look like EVD would be the best choice to run the show. Next to be tested was Dave. And what happened when he took over? Why dead silence, because Dave is living up to the award he was presented with last week proclaiming him the worst co-host ever, and he was yet again, not there when he was supposed to be. Obviously Dave would not be a very good choice either. Next up was Foul Mouth Girl. She did manage to play some Shotgun Messiah, one of her favorite bands, despite not doing very well at running the board, pushing a lot of wrong buttons, then she played Deicide. Now, like EVD, when she says she hates Deicide, we all know that is not the truth, she loves them, they're her favorite band, why she even likes them better than Shotgun Messiah! So when she walked away from the board, and said it was to get away from the Deicide, we know that was not the reason, she probably wanted to rock out to the band. She also was not looking a very likely candidate to run things. Just Joe was next. And he has actually run the show before, so he was certain he could do better than everyone thus far. He said he was going to play the Queensryche that EVD had wanted to play, but hadn't been able to. But, when he pressed the button, a techno version of The Smurfs was all that would play. Then he tried to play Divinity Destroyed, then Others, and finally, his beloved Elf, but the only thing that would play was techno-Smurfs. Well, I guess it could have been much worse, it could have been The Teletubbies. So, Just Joe had failed at taking over the show as miserably as he fails at almost everything else he tries to do. There was only one person left to test, Gorgar. He too tried to play Queensryche, and screamed. Although there was absolutely nothing there that they could see that he could have electrocuted himself on, he had apparently managed to do just that, and appeared to be dead. Only Gorgar could get himself electrocuted by trying to play a CD! Azkath slapped Gorgar hard repeatedly, trying to revive him, but it didn't work. However, playing Dokken for him, did. So I guess we have learned two very important things from this little experiment, one, Queensryche is very unlucky and probably playing it should be avoided, and, two, Azkath just can't die, he is not allowed to! Azkath told Gorgar that Just Joe had been the one to slap him in the face so hard, and that that was why his face was hurting. There was a segment of Adventures In Listening, two segments of Movie Time, and, Anomaly Corner was interspersed throughout the latter portion of the night.
-Fire Eater Wizard
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July 11, 2010 - Amelia is Dead and a Giant Returns
The band Amelia Is Dead was there for most of the first half of the program. They played three songs live and acoustic on the air, and songs from their CD were played as well. Stephanie, the singer, has a very loud, powerful voice, up there with Angela, the singer from the band If Man Is Five's, only not operatic. They were interviewed, telling us about themselves, as this was their first time on LE. Some of the band got hugged by Just Joe, and those members also got duct taped to Just Joe by EVD. Rob, from the band Chamber Law was there, but not on air, as he was there while the band was, and so was not on a microphone. July 18, 2010 - The I-Dose Experiments Begin
The Enforcer was there in the first talk break, he told us about his honeymoon in Mexico. Little Gorgar and Adam were there for a while. Azkath decided to try out an experiment on Just Joe. He wanted to test I-dosing on him. This is an Internet craze where you listen to music tones through headphones, so you have a different tone in each ear, and it creates a beat in your head, and you lie down, in a dark, quiet place, try to put yourself in a meditative state, stay that way for a length of time, say half an hour, and it's supposed to do things to your mind, which, according to some, could lead to bad things, and, according to others, does not. Azkath wanted to see what affect, if any, it would have on Just Joe. He had several sounds to try on him. The first one, although Just Joe claimed it had no affect on him, to everyone else it was clear that it had. He seemed kind of out there, breezy kind of. He decided to try that one again. Then he was given another one to try. After that one he seemed very jumpy. Trying another made him really agitated and angry, throwing stuff, and trying to destroy the studio, and acting very hostile. Although Just Joe kept insisting they were having no affect on him, he said he didn't want to try any more. Azkath said they would play Russian Roulette. If a bullet played, Just Joe would try one more. If no bullet, he wouldn't. A bullet right on the first song. But Just Joe refused to go downstairs and listen to any more. So Azkath tricked him into going near the stairs, saying that he had something for him that he would really like. He then kicked him down the stairs, and played him the last one. Although Just Joe kept insisting they had no affect on him, this one obviously made him very happy. He was all polite and happy and fuzzy for the rest of the night. So I-dosing clearly works on Just Joe, even if he doesn't realize it. There was Anomaly Corner interspersed throughout the last portion of the program, and two segments of Movie Time...
- Fire Eater Wizard
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July 25, 2010 - The I-Dose Experiments Continue
Ria was there for a little while in the middle of the night, and The Enforcer stopped by for one talk break in the middle of the program, much later than he is usually there. When Just Joe was asked about his experience last week with I-dosing, he still kept insisting that they had had absolutely no affect on him whatsoever, even though it had been obvious to everyone else that they had. He then asked if the MP3 player with the I-Doses on it was here, was told it was, and said of course he didn't care at all. However, he kept eyeing it, and trying to sneak over and take it, always saying that he didn't care about it at all. He was told there was now a new one on the MP3 player, one that was supposed to make you laugh. When a Russian Roulette Set was played, Just Joe was told that, if no bullet played, he could hear the new one, if a bullet played, he could not. Just Joe pretended not to care. Bullet, so no I-dosing for Just Joe. Still Just Joe kept being extremely fascinated with the MP3 player, and pretending not to be. Later, he was told that there would be a second Russian Roulette Set, same rules. This time, no bullet. Just Joe took the MP3 player downstairs, and listened to the new I-Dose, which, to refresh anyone's memory, or for anyone new here, is two tones, a different one in each ear, which, when listened to through headphones in a dark, quiet place for a half hour or an hour, in a meditative state, is supposed to change your brain waves, and affect your mind, altering it. Of course, given that it's Just Joe we're talking about here, assuming there is a mind there to alter is always a big assumption. Just Joe came back all giggly, laughing at everything, but saying that the I-dosing didn't work, he just found things funny, like, everything, funny. Azkath told Just Joe that there was one more new I-Dose on the MP3 player that he hadn't tried yet, that it was hidden on there, but that he could scroll around on there and try to find it if he wanted to. Just Joe said what would be the point in that, since none of them worked, and then promptly grabbed the MP3 player and headed for the basement. He returned from that in the last talk break of the night, and, he had obviously managed to find the hidden I-Dose, he was now acting totally retarded, pointing and giggling hysterically at everything. Luckily it was time to leave. Wow, good thing that I-dosing has no affect on Just Joe, lucky there is no way he's becoming addicted to them, because these behaviors he's been exhibiting lately for some strange, unexplained reason, well, they can be kinda a problem, annoying, especially this last one. There was Adventures In Listening, two segments of Movie Time, now with it's own movie background theme music, and an Anomaly Corner...
-Fire Eater Wizard
August 1, 2010 - Check Engine Acoustic
Tim, the vocalist for the band Check Engine, was there for the first couple hours of the program. He was interviewed, the songs from his band's CD were played, and he performed a few songs live and acoustic on the air. Just Joe was still sticking to his claim that the I-dosing they've been experimenting on him with for the last two weeks have absolutely no affect on him whatsoever, even though it's obvious to everyone else that they do. Azkath asked Just Joe where his MP3 player, with the I-doses on it, had gone. Just Joe said he had no idea, but Azkath searched him, and, what do you know, there was his MP3 player. Just Joe, of course, claimed he had no idea how it had gotten there. When it came time for Russian Roulette, Azkath told Just Joe he had a new I-Dose for him, and that, if no bullet played, he could have the MP3 player and listen to it. If a bullet played, Foul Mouth Girl could try it, to which Just Joe said he would go with her, just to make sure she knew how it worked, of course, although he didn't know why they were even bothering with it any more, since they clearly did not work. No bullet. Just Joe pretended he didn't care, and eagerly grabbed the MP3 player and raced off to the basement. I have never seen Just Joe so eager to hang out in the basement. Given all the horrible things that have happened to him there, all the bad things he's seen down there, and the many, many, many, many times he's been thrown down those stairs, he used to avoid the basement like the plague. Wonder what's changed?? Can't be that he loves I-Dosing, since it doesn't work at all. Azkath said he himself had created this biaurl, and that it was supposed to make you all drunk and goofy. And, go figure, that is exactly the way Just Joe came back from the basement, all laughing, and running after a ball that Azkath told him to chase, even though there was no ball, although Just Joe somehow returned with one, saying he'd found it. Azkath told Just Joe there was one more new I-Dose on the MP3 player, again, one that he himself had made, and that Just Joe could listen to it. Just Joe said he didn't care, grabbed the MP3 player and dashed down to the basement. Azkath said this one was supposed to make you paranoid. Just Joe came back all jumpy and somewhat hostile and accusatory, if you asked him any question at all he would snap "why do you want to know?". He would jump at any little thing, and wound up curled up in a fetal position in the corner. Dave, the worst co-host in the world, was actually there for a while at the beginning of the program, even picking out the first set of music. There were two segments of Movie Time in the last portion of the program. Just Joe ended up the night talking in a very monotone way, no matter what the conversation was he put no expression into it. Azkath told him it was ok to get excited, he yelled out excitedly once, then went back to being all expressionless... Ya know, Just Joe's been acting really weird lately, even for him. Wonder what could be causing it?? Has he been doing anything new lately? Can't think of anything. Oh yeah, there is the I-dosing, but it can't be that, since that doesn't work at all, just ask Just Joe. Of course, he might bite your head off for asking, or just point and giggle hysterically, if you do... Who knows what the cause is... Maybe it's from hanging out in the basement too much, some very strange shit has been known to happen down there...- Fire Eater Wizard
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August 8, 2010 - Joe vs The Water Balloons
EVD was there, but Dave was not, which leads us to conclude that EVD and Dave are the same person, or that EVD can morph into either one, because whenever EVD is there, Dave isn't, and vice versa. EVD strongly denies this, but no one believes him. Two women representing Wicked Ithaca dropped by to tell us about that upcoming event. Victoria was there for a little while and she concurred that EVD and Dave must be one and the same. Gorgar and Little Gorgar were there early in the night, much earlier than Gorgar is usually there. Azkath explained I-dosing to EVD and Gorgar. When Russian Roulette was played... If a bullet played, Gorgar would get to try the I-dosing. If no bullet, Azkath would play a special song just for Just Joe. And, if an EVD bullet played, EVD would get to try the I-dosing. No bullet. However, Just Joe was elsewhere when the set was playing, and wasn't listening, so they lied to him and told him a bullet had played. So Gorgar went down to the basement to lie quietly still and I-Dose. While he was doing that, Little Gorgar got to take Just Joe outside and throw water balloons at him, he came back inside soaked. When Gorgar finally came back, he was very un-Gorgar like, he was actually happy, very happy, which is never the case with him. He was so mellow and happy that he didn't even freak out in the slightest when told there was a big spider on his arm, or even when he was told that there were deer. He said it didn't matter, he liked deer. And, unlike Just Joe, who still tries to insist, no matter how much evidence there is to the contrary, that the I-dosing doesn't work at all, Gorgar readily admitted that they worked great. Gorgar departed all smiles and happy, again, an unbelievable sight. Azkath told Just Joe that they had lied to him, that there had been no bullet. But he said he would now play Just Joe the special song he would really like. It was a cover of "Mr. Roboto", by Mose Giganticus, which both Just Joe, and I, did enjoy very much indeed. There was a segment of Movie Time. Then, when he was supposed to be on the air, Just Joe wasn't there. Foul Mouth Girl was sent to look for him, and brought him back from the basement. And he had MP3 headphones on. Azkath accused him of I-dosing. Just Joe tried to deny it, but, once again, Azkath found his MP3 player on Just Joe. Azkath told Just Joe that he was not allowed to I-dose any more, and, besides, why should he care, since they have no effect on him at all? Just Joe kept trying to sneak off with the MP3 player again, so Azkath gave him a brutal beat down. Then he kept taunting an injured Just Joe with the MP3 player, asking him if he wanted it, when Just Joe said yes, telling him he couldn't have it, telling him "here it is", then saying "but not for you", and pulling it away from him. In the last talk break of the night, however, Just Joe once again had managed to get his hands on the MP3 player (he is nothing if not determined). When Azkath tried to grab it away from him, he ran away with it, and, because he was running so hard, and not paying attention to where he was going, he fell right down the basement stairs. But he still had the MP3 player, and he was now down in the basement with it, so I guess, regardless of how he got there, he was happy. That could change, or increase, depending on which I-dose he started listening to down there... - Fire Eater Wizard
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August 15, 2010 - I-Dosing Dave
EVD and Dave were both there, which might tend to disprove Azkath's theory of the week before that they are the same person, which EVD had strongly denied. Azkath had them take a picture with everyone in it, to document that both EVD and Dave were in it. He then told Shane, who was there after a long, long absence to prove that they were the same person. Shane said that he could do that, and went off to do so. He didn't come back. Azkath wanted to I-dose Dave. He was taken down to the basement, and left there I-Dose. When they brought him back up, the only thing he would do and say was scream "oogie woogie, oogie woogie" over and over. He ran outside and attacked a car going by screaming oogie woogie, oogie woogie at them. Everyone ran outside after Dave, they had to tackle him, and there was a humping pile. They finally got him inside, and, thanks to Adam, chained him to a chair. They found out that the way to cure Dave from oogie woogie-ing, was to feed him a pepperoni. Once Dave was back to being Dave, he said that he was upset that he had failed the Dead Host drill of a few weeks back, where Azkath would think up a scenario that would have led to his death, and everyone there would try to take over and run the show. Everyone had failed. And Dave had failed because when it was his turn to try and run the show, there was only silence, because, being that he is the worst co-host in the world, he wasn't there. Dave claimed that he could run the show and wanted to try. So Azkath devised the scenario, he was stuck on his roof, and raccoons ate his face, and he died, and then the raccoons set him on fire. Just Joe later had a problem with this, as these were things that happened to him, not Azkath, Just Joe accused Azkath of stealing other people's events, but for now they were going with that. Dave was told that he had to successfully play a Queensryche song, which no one else had been able to do, and then play a request of Little Gorgar's. Dave did both successfully, which means, I guess, that he is by far the most capable of taking over the program, the only one actually, but unfortunately, it doesn't matter, because he is never there to be able to run it should the need arise. Just Joe said that he wanted another chance to try running the show. But when he tried to play Queensrryche, the same thing that had happened before happened again, the only thing that would play no matter what he did was The Smurfs, doing a techno thing, which no one could ever even figure out where it had came from. Just Joe decided that, instead of playing music, he would give the webcam viewers a special treat, a puppet show. He had a glove with five monkeys on it for the fingers, and a Cthulhu puppet. He had Cthulhu start eating the monkeys. Dave is terrified of puppets for some reason (puppets and trees), so he ran away shrieking, and in his blind rush to get away knocked Azkath down the basement stairs, which is a first, in all these years, and all the people who have gone tumbling down those stairs, most often Just Joe, Azkath never has. He announced that falling down the stairs officially sucked, which I'm sure a lot of people would readily agree with him on, especially Just Joe. Azkath was pissed at Just Joe for causing him to fall down the stairs by bringing out his puppets and scaring Dave, and he threw Joe down the stairs. Dave was now gone for the night. There was a segment of Adventures In Listening, begun with new Soundgarden, of all things, but I liked it, and two segments of Movie Time. Gorgar was there in the last two hours of the program. He told us he'd been having some problems with his heart. We all wish him well with that, hopefully they will be cleared up soon. In the mean time, I guess, for his own good, the more bad things that happen to him at LE, the less they will happen to him in general... - Fire Eater Wizard
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August 22, 2010 - Just Joe Gets Sent Away...
The week before, EVD, Dave, and Shane had all been there, tending to disprove the theory that EVD and Dave are really the same person. Shane had been told to prove that they were the same person. He had said he could do that, and then departed to get the proof. He had promised to bring the found proof this week, but now none of the three were there. So the mystery remains. Jess, from Wicked Ithaca, stopped by for one talk break near the beginning of the program to update us on that upcoming event. Tim, formerly of Century Media, and before that, of Victory Records, who hasn't been at LE for quite a while was there for about three hours. Ria was also there for a while. There were three segments of Movie Time interspersed throughout the night. Tim joined in on two of them, and Ria did on one. Just Joe had been claiming that he had not I-dosed in two weeks, and was done with it. No one really believed him, though. At the end of the program, Azkath found Just Joe outside, near the ditch, passed out in the rain, wet and shivering, with headphones on! He had been I-dosing! He tried to deny that that was what he had been doing, but it was obvious. Azkath told Just Joe that he was sending him into rehab, that he was staging an intervention. Just Joe said that he didn't need rehab, that he could stop any time he wanted to. And, besides, he went on, there was no such thing as rehab for I-dosing. Azkath insisted that he was going to put him into rehab. Which is very considerate of him, and really the least he can do, since he is the one who got Just Joe addicted to I-dosing in the first place... The program ended with Just Joe wanting to go get in the ditch and listen to I-doses some more. Yeah, right, he definitely doesn't have a problem, no addiction there at all!
-Fire Eater Wizard
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August 29, 2010 - Just Joe is in Rehab
EVD was there. Dave was not, causing Azkath to claim again that they are the same person, which, EVD, again, denied but could not prove. Shane, who is supposed to produce the proof that they are the same person, and claimed he had it, was still not there either. Just Joe was not there because he was still in rehab for I-dosing, where Azkath had put him after finding him passed out in the ditch, in the rain, shivering, and I-dosing, the week before. Just Joe called in, reporting from rehab, and was not happy to hear that he would be billed for his rehab. So, even though Azkath got him hooked on the I-dosing, he is only staging the intervention, not paying for it. That's evil Demons for you! Tim, formerly of Century Media, and, before that, of Victory Records, was there. He and EVD participated in Movie Time, of which there were two segments. There was a segment of Adventures In Listening, and, the program ended with an hour long Feature Artist, which was Agent Steel, an hour of their music...
- Fire Eater Wizard
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